A part of me has been soul searching whilst being away and I am kind of torn. A part of me is growing up, trying to figure out life, trying to see what my future will be like, if I'll meet new people, if I'll still be around the same people I know now, if they will still want to be around me, or if I'll still exist.
The other part of me still wants to be that little girl that gets shy around new encounters and hides behind her mother, wary of the world, afraid to see what is beyond the threshold of her childhood home, nervous about disappointing or hurting anyone's feelings in the process.
Truly, I won't know until I explore the uncharted waters and when each encounter comes forth, I will deal with them as best a I can.
Until then, I'll keep my eyes on the stars.... Trying to find my way back home....
TTFN
Lexy♥
3 comments:
You are always in control of where you take your next step in life. Your friends may change and locations will be different but all this does is open new doors and offer new opportunities that were not there before. Change will always happen and we can do little to effect this, but we can still enjoy life no matter where we are.
Thank you so much for your kind words ♥ It really means a lot...
Hey Lex, I ironically enough have been feeling the same way lately. What I've learned from all of this is you can control your life to an extent. Some things will unravel themselves, all you can do is adjust your attitude about the things that happen. I've been in this slump where I've been lazy and when I get home from work, all I want to do is play Skyrim or read a book, you know, just be lazy. But I've realized that at some point in time I have to grow up and be an adult and take responsibility. And I feel that was the reason I haven't been ready to have kids yet. Now I'm cleaning and keeping the house nice when I get home and getting things done that have needed to be done for a while. I'm thinking about the future and where I want to be in five years. Just remember, your mom will always be there for you to help you and pick you up when you fall, just as you will when you have kids. You get to a spot in your life where things are comfortable and it's hard to move on. But one day you will realize what you want in life and then things will take off. <3
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